Letting Go……How hard can it be??

let go

My two year old cupcake is a fiesty lil bundle. I have often described her to friends as a just shaken effervescent bottle of Coke and i sometimes feel that is an understatement! She’s smart, sassy, and downright entertaining (or maybe its just cos i’m her mommy?). But, everyone who’s ever met her or spent time with her concurrs!

Some days ago, she had a shirt with her and tried to do up the buttons. After trying and not getting the progress she was expecting, she turned to me and went “mommy, button it for me”, which was well and good; but she made no attempt to release the shirt! In her mind, i was going to take the shirt and do up all the buttons, when all she wanted was a demo with one button! So she’s complaining ‘do it for me’ and at the same time i’m complaining “sweetie, just let go” and the shirt is still unbuttoned and i’m getting frustrated and…. Then it hit me: this baby is just like me!

In my every day life, i have so many situations like this one! I have a challenge/problem/situation/issue and like the word says i try to give it to God to take care of it for me…but i dont surrender…no! I still hang on, trying to solve a problem i supposedly just surrendered to the Lord! And just like it was with Sunshine, while i’m not letting go, the problem isnt being solved! God doesn’t want to contend for power with a control freak like me, or my fiesty Sunshine for that matter! He needs full control, willingly offered. That’s why part of my resolutions (i prefer decisions) for 2013 include not stressing myself over things i cant change. If its not working, i’ll just go back to a habit i developed in university/nysc that worked wonders! Get a shoe box and label it “Things for God to handle” and then write down on individual pieces of paper every issue  I’m challenged with and  afterwards toss the paper into the box and will myself to forget about it! I’ll tell you something about how this helped me years ago. When i opened the box in a month or 2 to review the issues i had been bothered by, i realised they had either been solved or were no longer as stressful as before. The important thing is that, GOD TOOK CHARGE, because i let Him!!!

Now, If only my hubby didnt give me a new reason to drop a note everyday! 🙂




Yep, that’s the date. very inconspicuous but important. That’s the date i made up my mind to start this thing, Because, let’s face it, one’s gotta get up and get something done at some point. Sunshine is with her grand parents (God, I miss her) and the retching that came with Butterball’s first trimeter is abating so i have a little more energy. On a lighter note, Sunshine will be two in six days!! God, how time flies. From that little ball of fat that entered the world hungry and sought out my voice from day one, to the self assured young woman who still seeks out my voice in a crowded room and demands her favourite song from me at any point. Its hard sometimes to correlate how much she’s grown to the passage of time, cos, lets face it, i live with the munchkin. so when everyone says, “oh she’s so big for a 2 year old”, or “oh, her singing is so cute and her voice is so clear”, i just go “yeah,yeah”. But, i can see how that can be a big deal. She makes my world go round…no, seriously…she’s my world. (ok, that will have hubby screaming heh heh). But i’m surprised a lot of times when i look at her… Me?? a mom?? to this lovely ,smart, outspoken confident child?? I just have to hug myself..lol. Ok, enough with the self adulation. I feel a headache coming on. Off to bed.


mama sunshine

The happiness chronicles-inspired by Tonto Dikeh

       Except you’ve been living under a rock, you have probably been assaulted with various images and forwarded messages vilifying and castigating the latest star (i use that term very loosely) on the Nigerian music firmament – Miss Tonto Dikeh. Different images were altered with photo shop to present the subjects saying several things about the song and its singer. One particularly  funny one shows the picture of president Obama wondering why the ‘songbird’ didnt wait for the elections to be concluded before the song’s  release-prompting taunts of how the ‘song’ (again used very loosely) had far-reaching global implications.

      My reaction to this and other similarly skewed pictures is simple-a shake of the head and a small smile. My country is a beautiful place. Once described by pundits as ‘one of the happiest people on earth’-which I really doubt, we have perfected the art of using a powerful weapon, humor, to mask most of our problems. A few weeks ago, the biggest issue on the horizon was the murder of four university students nicknamed the ‘Aluu 4’ in Port Harcourt. The young men were lynched after being wrongly accused of armed robbery. Few days after that horror swept the airwaves and citizens expressed their pain and dismay, caricatures of the event were everywhere. Pictures showing a young man dumping his girlfriend because her Aluu relatives would think he ‘stole’ her heart and others equally making light of the situation reigned everywhere and again Nigerians were laughing. The tension was broken and we were regaled with statements like the usual ‘life goes on’ and indeed, it does.

      When in january this year the ‘occupy Nigeria’ movement came to a head, protesting the removal of the petroleum subsidy, I thought we had crossed the rubicon. Maybe, finally we were beginning to understand the gravity of the state our nation was in. That was before the protest ended and people starting naming their friends ‘subsideen’, oghene-subsidy, and greetings like barka da subsidy and eku subsidy became the norm. To be fair, i gladly adopted the ‘eku subsidy’ greeting as really, I didn’t know what else to do. Ditto everyone else. I guess that’s the problem. We’re all helpless. Because the average person really doesn’t know what else to do, the easiest solution is to attack the situation with humor. and then I had an epiphany-‘maybe that is why we have way lower cases of depression and high blood pressure than the Western world and why we are indeed the ‘happiest people on earth. so why fight it?? Peace comes with going with the flow; so on that note, Eku Tonto Dikeh guys – heh heh heh .

P.s: and for those who have no idea what the hullabaloo is about, be my guest